Emails from Kirsten & Naoto
March 2003

Date: Wed, 5 Mar 2003 03:16:23 -0800 (PST)
Subject: Princess Alameda

Dear Friends and Family:

No excuses. I haven't been busy; just not full of interesting observations recently.

Mia, on the other hand isn't just growing, she's bounding up the ladder of toddlerhood full tilt.

She recognizes phrases, words, and simple commands (like "throw it away", "kiss daddy", "do you want to watch teletubbies" etc. etc.)

Her vocabulary is growing. It is working out that she learns English and Japanese vocabulary in separate areas. (family and animals are japanese, up, down, car, clock, fish, grapes, cheese, snack, train are english) I think this is because Naoto tends to point out animals in Japanese during the day and I teach Mia other words in English from her picture dictionary book.

Mia is a LOUD girl. A few days she was standing in a store and caught a glimpse of a stuffed Winnie the Pooh. All of a sudden 25 different shoppers were turning to look as Mia proceeded to scream "wan wan" over and over again. She isn't what you call shy. After the wan wan screaming, she proceeded to wave to all 25 onlookers.

Princess Alameda

Did I ever explain why we call Mia Princess Alameda? If you have ever seen Episode 1 or 2 of Star Wars, you know that one main character is Princess Amidala. Well, we used to live in Alameda, California. You get my drift...

The numbers 3, 5, and 7 are important for children in Japan. Traditionally, boys at age 5 and girls at age 3 and 7 got dressed in miniature kimonos and went to be blessed at local temples. (they also got sweets and money and toys from doting grandparents)

Following in that tradition, 3/3, 5/5, and 7/7 are special holidays in Japan related to children. 3/3 is called "Hina matsuri" (princess festival,
http://japanese.about.com/library/weekly/aa022501b.htm)

It is a holiday to celebrate girls. Japanese people put up these elaborate displays of dolls in traditional dress, eat sweetened puffed rice, and drink sweet sake soup.(amazake,
http://members.aol.com/tokyopics/amazake.html)

Of course, we had no dolls for our own Princess Alameda. However, a few days before Hina matsuri, the Tokyo grandparents swept in with an expensive Prince and Princess in all 12-layer kimono regalia. (I dispair of ever getting them back over the Pacific)

I am not sure if Mia fully appreciates them. However, it was worth any amount of fuss to see how happy Baba and Jiji were to be able to present these dolls to the first grandchild of their eldest son. Baba told me "I didn't even buy dolls like this for my own daughter. But for a grandchild, you have to."

It's times like this that I don't regret the financially and emotionally difficult decision to move back to Japan for Mia's baby years.

Speaking of travel, however, the suzuki/lincoln brigade is currently buying tickets to visit Hawaii, Cleveland, and Iowa City in August. We will be in Cleveland from 8/5-8/24 with a little jaunt to Iowa in the middle (8/16-19).

We hope to see the Cleveland contingent at that time.

Love and light,
Kirsten

Click on picture to enlarge

Date: Thu, 20 Mar 2003 01:32:30 -0800 (PST)
Subject: black and white and yellow

Dear Friends and Family:

Well, we are anxiously awaiting the arrival of my father and his wife for their first sojourn to Japan. Naoto and I are mulling over all the things we want them to see...and eat.

Mia is learning the word no. She has been shaking her head no for a while now, but today she said "no" to me several times. Of course she always said it right before she did something she knows she isn't supposed to do. It is a great warning system for me right now.

Mia's favorite game right now is playing "sleep." She pulls a blanket over herself and lies down wherever she happens to be. I wonder where she learned that game? (NAOTO!)

Black and white and yellow

Another thing about Japanese tv. As a reflection of Japanese culture, the way black americans are treated is offensive.

What got my dander up this time? A "corner" on a popular, prime-time quiz show on Sunday nights that features a "teach Japanese to foriegners section."

A famous American "teaches" three (2 american, one Ivory Coast) men Japanese. Actually the teacher just takes them to different places such as a restaurant, gas station, ball park, etc, and has them practice their language by "working." He doesn't actually "teach" them, he calls them stupid, hits them on the head, and generally treats them like children. The three "students" purposefully mangle their Japanese (they are in reality fluent, otherwise they wouldn't be able to mangle the Japanese so effectively nor understand what the native Japanese speakers around them are saying) and basically act stupidly.

Why is this a problem? You guessed it, the teacher is white and the three students are black. Not too subtle, is it?

After the little clip is done, the quiz show goes back to the native Japanese guests who have a good laugh over how stupid and clueless the students are.

Naoto watches this show almost every Sunday night. When I mentioned how racist this was, he was like, oh it's not that bad. They're just pretending. However, when I asked him to name just one positive character/image of a black american on tv, he couldn't. The only other famous black american is Bob Sap right now. (kickboxer type dude who used to play pro football in the states)

He is famous for appearing on a comedy show. He dresses up as a Japanese demon and goes around scaring "bad" actors by physically picking them up and growling.

So, what are the main images of black americans on Japanese tv? Childlike, stupid students (who are controlled by a white man) and a demon.

There is a none-too-subtle hierarchy of foriegners here. I occupy second from the top (I'm not male) as a white american female. I am at once relieved and guilty.

love and light,
Kirsten

p.s. Mia loves her stuffed animals. Despite my buying her action figures and trucks, she mostly plays with teddy bears and stuffed dogs.

Click on picture to enlarge.

Date: Wed, 26 Mar 2003 02:16:22 -0800 (PST)
Subject: It's all about awe

Dear Friends and Family:

My father and Linda left two days ago. I called them this morning to make sure they made it home okay. I wasn't really worried that much about them- but still.

I am not going to say much about Iraq in my emails. Those of you who know me probably know my opinion.

I just have two things to say. One, the coverage of the war here in Japan is probably different than that of the U.S.

Second, when I look at the faces of the soldiers- U.S. or Iraqi- or the faces of the Iraqi people, I see Mia. Someone stayed up with each of those people all night when they were sick. Someone thrilled at their first steps. Someone changed their diapers 6 times a day. It seems unbearable to me that all that time and energy invested in a person should go to such waste.

Okay, on to other topics.

Mia's vocabulary is growing by leaps and by bounds. She can correctly point to vacuum cleaner, book, shoes, hat, various animals, train, car, motorcycle, and plane in a book (English). She loves to talk, she babbles to herself a lot, especially when she goes to sleep.

She is beginning to be independent. She doesn't want mommy to touch her food if it is finger food. Yesterday we spent 30 minutes changing her clothes because she wouldn't let me help her put on her t-shirt. (she couldn't do it herself so the episdoe ended in tears and frustration) She won't hold my hand on our walks unless there is a hole in the road or a steep incline.

Nature or nurture? I am convinced babies are born with distinct personalities. Mia is definitely a distinct personality. Especially if you compare her with her cousin Misko...

It's all about awe

So we took dad and linda to Kyoto. Kyoto is kind of like..well, it's full of... okay, it is difficult to describe if you aren't an Asian history buff.

Imagine Notre Dame du Paris, Buckingham Palace, the Sistine Chapel, and various other European cultural treasures all together in one city. That's Kyoto. It is chock full of 1000 year old temples, shrines, palances. As the former capital of Japan for about 1000 years, you can imagine the history infused into each little stone.

Anyway, I can remember the first time I went to Kyoto. As a Japanese studies major in college, it was kind of a mecca for me. I walked through the streets in the thrall of a kind of unbelieving awe. My mind couldn't comprehend the beauty or history of the temples in front of me. I felt chills when I touched the ancient wood or stepped on stone steps Japanese pilgrims have climbed for over a 1000 years.

This time I could see some of the same awe in my father and linda. It was great. I've wanted to show my father Japan for years and years now.

Naoto didn't seem to be feeling that kind of awe. (of course he had to juggle his parents, my parents, me, and Mia, can anyone say "stress bunny"?) However, Ryoanji (http://www.kiis.or.jp/rekishi/kyoto/kyoto10-e.html) a Zen garden temple really seemed to have a quieting effect on Naoto.

Surprisingly enough, this time (my third time in Kyoto) I didn't feel much awe either. I was a little disappointed. I kept readying myself for that feeling to wash over me. It never came. I could appreciate the temples at an intellectual level, but they were so familiar to me.

It made me wonder- am I taking Japan for granted? I haven't really lived here long enough to call it "old hat." At some level, taking things for granted here relieves me from some pressures of every day living. On another level, taking things for granted here makes me start to wonder just who I am really. On even another level, I mourn for that Kirsten who walked the streets of Kyoto the first time, that Kirsten who felt herself in the presence of something ancient and sublime.

I want the sublime back.

love and light,
Kirsten

p.s. photos from kyoto. Me, Mia, and Dad in a back street near Kiyomizudera, and Naoto and Linda at Ryoanji

Click on image to enlarge.

Click to enlarge.

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